


please don't leave me

by unityManipulator



Category: Hermitcraft RPF
Genre: I genuinely have no idea how to tag this i just. i dunno man, M/M, Nightmares, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-12 23:08:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29392452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unityManipulator/pseuds/unityManipulator
Summary: When the hermits moved from Season 5 to Season 6, some things, and some people, were left behind. Doc never quite forgave himself for that.(Written February 2019)
Relationships: John | BDoubleO100/Steffen Mossner | Docm77
Comments: 1
Kudos: 18





	please don't leave me

Doc is back in that old jungle temple that the NHO had found their first week in the world, and he  _ hates  _ it. 

He walks through the crumbling halls, moss-covered cobblestone under his feet, and he blinks away dust as he comes to the arched entrance with the twin crafting tables and sees the old skull he used to live in. 

_ Welcome home,  _ the skull seems to say,  _ welcome back. _

Doc turns, marching steadily towards the edge of the jungle, towards the desert they had first come out of the nether into, but stops when his boot crunches against a dirt path.

_ Oh,  _ he thinks,  _ oh. _

Bdubs’ tree stands before him, towering and intimidating, and he turns quickly to go back the way he came only to be met with more seamless jungle. 

The only way to go is forward, crunching leaves and dirt and planks of wood below his feet until the small cottage comes into view and he sighs.

He doesn't want to go in, but the tree is his other option and that's worse, so he walks to the door and pauses as a cat's meow splits the air. Just once, soft and lonely and long since forgotten, an echo in the air rather than anything real.

His hand meets the knob and he turns it even though he knows he shouldn't. The door opens and he stops because he's just walked into the first foyer of the tree.

As he stands, frozen, the door slams behind him and he hears movement upstairs. Before he can turn to open it, to  _ run, _ he's face to face with Bdubs.

Bdubs’ clothes are tattered, held together by a few threads in some places and entirely hanging off of him in others. His headband is completely missing, replaced by the vines twirling across his forehead and through his hair. Those same vines cross his face, his neck, down his shoulders and torso and arms, curled and tangled and  _ part of him _ , Doc's brain supplies.  _ They're part of him. _

“Doc!” Bdubs grins, spreading his arms wide. “Where've you been, buddy? We've been missing you lately!” 

“I, uh.” 

“You and Etho  _ and  _ Beef, can you believe it? It feels like I'm the only one here nowadays.” Bdubs crosses the room, hooking an arm around Doc's waist, and Doc tries not to squirm away from the vine that shifts against his back. 

“I've been in the new world,” Doc answers before he can stop himself. Bdubs freezes.

“What're you talking about?” 

Doc's mouth betrays him. “We left. But listen, we-”

“You  _ left,”  _ Bdubs repeats, his eyes narrowing. He pulls back his arm, turning to face Doc, and the vine follows suit after the briefest of pauses. “And I suppose Etho and Beef just  _ left _ too, didn't they?”

“They  _ did, _ but it was a long time ago. I stayed, I-”

“Oh, sure, you stayed all right! Didn't stay with  _ me _ though!” Bdubs is pacing, crossing the small room in a few steps before turning back and stalking towards Doc, stopping a foot from the other man then turning again. “No! You decided to wait until it was convenient, then you left to a whole new world and you shacked up with  _ Rendog! _ ”

“Everyone else was going! I didn't want to-”

“ _ No!”  _ Bdubs spits, and Doc freezes. “I don't believe that for a  _ second,  _ Doc! You could have stayed here! I stayed. Does the NHO- no, do  _ I _ mean nothing to you?”

“It wasn't about that,” Doc protests weakly. “We tried to look for you, honest! You weren't here. I didn't want to leave you behind. I wanted you to come too.”

Bdubs cocks his head to the side, listening. Doc continues in a rush. “I looked for you for days. It was the jungle, it's like you had just… vanished. I couldn't find you. They had to drag me through that portal, you know. I fought them every second, because I didn't want to lose you.” As Bdubs steps closer, his face blank, Doc feels the first tears fall. “I missed you, of course I did. How could I not, Bdubs? I couldn't come back, I couldn't find you, but I wanted to. I  _ tried _ to-” 

Bdubs’ hand is warm in his, and just for a moment, Doc can pretend that the vine brushing his wrist isn't there. “Well,” Bdubs starts, “I'm here. You can stay here now, can't you?”

Doc hesitates, his eyes skimming over the vines covering the other man. Bdubs’ cheeks are flushed, his eyes bright, and the vines crossing his forehead are beginning to flower in vibrant pinks and oranges. His fingers tighten in Doc's as he blinks slowly and sighs, leaning close. “Just stay here? Like old times, y'know? The NHO can be back together again.”

It would be so  _ easy  _ to stay, Doc knows. So easy to just let himself curl up in this tree, to fall asleep and wake up the next morning. He sighs, bracing himself for the fallout he knows is about to happen.

“I can't.”

The flowers wilt as fast as they bloomed when he pulls back, letting Bdubs’ hand fall from his. He blinks away tears as he watches Bdubs’ face twist in rage and betrayal and anguish. He stands silently, not bothering to duck the first punch thrown his way.

He wakes with a jolt, wiping tears from his cheeks before he feels Ren's arms around his shoulders. “Bad dream?”

Doc doesn't trust himself to speak just yet, so he nods. 

“What was it about?” Ren asks, and Doc shakes his head.

“I can't remember,” he lies, and Ren indulges him and just pulls him closer. “I'm sorry, I’m  _ sorry,” _ Doc mumbles into Ren's chest, and Ren knows the apology isn't meant for him so he just sits quietly as Doc sobs.


End file.
